Raptor Jesus appeared before me, and he said:
"Take heed my son, for there shall be many who doubt me, but
whosoever believeth in me shall have everlasting life." I wept with
joy at the gift bestowed, "Yet, my lord, what fate shall be given
to the unworthy?" He answered: "Their entrails shall be rent from
their stomachs, their limbs ripped from their torso, to feast our
hungry bodies, and restore our souls. Whensoever you feast upon the
heart of thine enemy, think of me." For that is the beauty of
Raptor Jesus.
One day, Raptor Jesus walked a busy street with his disciple,
Anonymous. Anonymous and his like-named brethren populated the land
on which they strolled, as common as blades of grass. They walked,
discussing many things, but, Anonymous paused for a moment."Lord?"
he spoke, "Is not this idle talk frowned upon by your father?" And
quoth Raptor Jesus; "All voice communicates knowledge. Knowledge is
hardly frowned upon by anyone, and thus your "idle talk" does not
exist, unless you speak of memes. Memes are idle, as they are
merely communication of things all know of" And thus our Lord
beckoned to a painting of an insanely smiling man. "However, memes
can bring laughter and happiness, thus, one can surmise that He
enjoys them, and hardly frowns upon them" And Anonymous looked
ahead, silent.